July 22, 2005

On not being sure.

Today another company came for campus placements to my college — another company I blew off. The list so far is:

  • MBT — I flunked the aptitude test.
  • L&T Infotech — I saw their presentation & skipped the test.
  • Hexaware — I didn’t even go to college for the test.
  • Bristlecone — which was today. I saw the presentation and skipped the test…again.

This almost makes it seem like I don’t want a job, or like I’m in denial or something. I skipped these companies for several reasons; the main ones being that they didn’t offer too much money, and that they didn’t feel right.

This is sort of weird, but I’ve always known where I’m going in life. Until now. After my school, I knew I wanted to do a Diploma. The first time I heard of Shah & Anchor, I just knew I’d go there. The first time I heard of SIES, I just knew I’d do my engineering there.

I also always knew I wanted to work with computers — that I knew from the first time I laid my hands on one. But I don’t exactly know what I want to do.

For sure I’m not going to be doing any post-graduation, management is not for me & more technical education will be a joke. If I were to think about my future, a task I don’t do lightly, I’d want to be in a small company; the perfect size if four people. Probably a company a bunch of like-minded people have formed, where we do some product development work. Nothing related to enterprise software development. Hell, I’ve even picked up a cool name for the company if I float it myself. But the idea is to get some experience, but more importantly some money, before doing something like this.

I’ve just not felt that any of there companies that have come to my college are just right for me, so I can’t really try to join them. So I’m holding out for something better for the time being…

One advantage of my reticence is that it will ‘thin out the herd’ so to speak. When (& if) more companies come later on, there will be fewer people competing for jobs. But the obvious disadvantage is that I don’t get any experience with the whole ‘process’; and the way they recruit fresher is just ridiculous.

There is always an aptitude test, which I’m not really worried about. But from then on it gets tough — group discussion & interviews. And I’m not a social person, I can’t really perform well in that stuff.

I had gone today thinking I’ll clear the aptitude test, and get some experience with the groups discussion & so on. Couldn’t do it though, it just felt weird trying to apply for a job I don’t want; especially given that so many of the others really wanted it…

Ohh, next up is Persistent Systems, and reading about it gives me a slight tingle. I think this will be a good one to try for, only thing remains is getting cleared.

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